Bullying is more frequent than is believed and thousands of children and adolescents suffer daily (Getty)
According to UNICEF, when talking about bullying, it also refers to bullying. Both words are synonymous with the same behavior: physical and/or psychological persecution carried out by one student against another in a negative, continuous and intentional way. This same action can also take place on the internet, which is why it is called cyberbullying or cyberbullying. In this environment, the harasser has a sense of anonymity and the consequences are more difficult to assess. On World Day Against Bullying, what are the signs that indicate that a boy is being bullied?
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The United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization, known as UNESCO, estimates that “246 million children and adolescents could be victims of violence in and around their schools.” “Although it is known that bullying leaves deep marks on those who have been victims, schools often do not provide spaces for dialogue, which ends up encouraging silence, indifference and concealment,” UNICEF said in a document issued in 2022.
In this sense, they pointed out that “many times the resolution of these situations is based on quick responses that do not necessarily seek to listen to the people involved so that they are part of the construction of solutions.” “Bullying is a form of violence that can occur between girls, boys and adolescents, and that consists of the intentional, deliberate and repeated search to make the other feel humiliated. For that other person to feel humiliated, there must be spectators who support whoever does it and do not protect or save whoever is put in that place,” said María Zysman, a graduate in Psychopedagogy, founder of Libres de Bullying, in a dialogue with Infobae.
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At the same time, he pointed out that “to achieve this structure of humiliation, whoever has this behavior will resort to everything they can in order to make those who are victimized feel that they are worthless, or that they are worth less and that they should leave.” Since bullying covers all forms of physical, verbal or social harassment that students commit towards one or more classmates.
Some 250 million kids around the world could be victims of violence in and around their schools, UNESCO warned / (iStock)
Whether on social networks or in real life, both the victim and the promoter of bullying have certain particularities, say UNICEF. It is that while one is based on shyness, the other is shown in the opposite way. So, what are the 8 behaviors of someone who is bullied?
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1. Frequently shows low self-esteem, insecurity or shyness, may stop hanging out with friends and continually seek adult company.
2. He is usually isolated by his peers and has little support on social networks.
3. You can show passive, provocative reactions (imitating your harassers) or reproduce the harassment towards other victims.
4. There are signs that may be stopping attending class, lowering performance or showing disinterest in school.
5. Stop participating in your peer group.
6. Suffer sudden mood swings, in your diet or in your use of social media.
7. You can manifest fear of loneliness, panic attacks, insomnia or nightmares.
8. You can present physical injuries, lose things or take them broken.
There are actions that adults can take to prevent bullying and if, despite this, it happens, it is important to listen to the children / Photo: Andina
On the other hand, UNICEF also listed some behaviors that make it possible to recognize an aggressor or bully, as well as a cyberbully:
1. Acts impulsively seeking recognition and acceptance.
2. Manipulative, aggressive and has a low tolerance for frustration.
3. The cyberaggressor can behave normally on the physical plane and show his aggressive side on the networks.
4. Cyber-aggressor is anyone who produces content, uploads it to websites, sees it and shares it.
A report published by UNICEF in 2018 states that “half of students between the ages of 13 and 15 around the world report having experienced violence between peers in and around schools”
Regarding what are the signs to recognize if a child is being bullied, the specialist highlighted that “there are signs that can respond to being victimized at school. The truth is that any boy or girl who changes their habits, her behavior when eating, sleeping, looking at others, being attentive or aware of her devices is expressing something. It may or may not have to do with bullying. In many situations, the boys who are being victimized complain about school, are irritable, very reactive, or sleep too much; all of this has to alert us to come closer to speak”.
“The impact of bullying on a person’s life affects their self-esteem and mental health, has consequences for self-confidence and for others, as well as poor school performance, and can even lead to dropout.” school. These situations show the need to have protocols for families and communities. For this reason, it is important to address these phenomena from a rights perspective, being aware that girls, boys and adolescents are also exposed to violence in the institutions of their communities,” UNICEF highlighted in the document.
At the same time, the expert added: “A boy, girl or adolescent who is being victimized by their peers, who is suffering from bullying or who is starring in it, basically changes their behavior; He is a boy who goes out, that the brightness of his eyes goes away, that he cries for no reason, that he stops studying if he was very studious or starts to study much more to abstract himself from everything that happens outside, alterations appear sleep, eating disorders, kids who stop eating, who go on extremely strict, harmful diets, because many times, as a consequence of bullying, they seek to change their body image.”
“The boys who are victimized no longer live it so silently; often complain that they have no one to work with or are not invited home to play” (Getty)
“Basically they are boys who change their state of mind, their behavior, their look, their physical appearance and in addition to this there are things that are observed such as bruises, blows, misalignment when returning from school, loss of belongings, loss of practical work that they had made, out of money,” Zysman listed.
As pointed out by UNICEF, bullying can be prevented with actions that are basically in the hands of adults. “With so much information circulating, sometimes not entirely accurate, there are teachers who wait for the boy to be destroyed to realize that there is bullying, and they have to intervene at the first signs,” said Zysman.
“Give importance to the suffering of the boys without the need for them to go to the extreme. There are small discriminatory gestures of mockery, nicknames, contemptuous glances, exclusions, even if they are small, they have to open our eyes,” reflected the expert and added: “Parents have to listen, be it to the child or to whom they have referred, which may be the another classmate’s mother, a classmate of the boy, or the older brother, for example; and be very careful with the child so as not to put pressure on him. For fear of hurting us, they don’t want to fully tell what happens, because many times they have that fear. They constantly tell me that they don’t count because when the big ones count, they complicate it more”.
In the school environment there are different types of violence, and this varies depending on age (Getty)
The suggestion is always “listen to the child, because he may even be at an age where you think he has to fix himself, but you don’t have the resources. And then it is the adult who must ‘lend’ them”. As? “Listening, giving him confidence, not overflowing, keeping all the calm in the world and with everything he can tell us, agree with him if he approves that we go to school, telling him that we are going to demand confidentiality. Parents have to ask for confidentiality, both with our son if he is harassed and with respect to the actions of the school with the harasser ”.
For its part, UNICEF pointed out four actions that adults can take to prevent bullying:
1. Foster affective bonds and teach to detect toxic relationships.
2. Openness to diversity and accepting difference as wealth works.
3. Being a witness to a case of bullying teaches that you always have to act.
4. Educate in the use of technology in their day to day, teaching your children to navigate with a critical sense.
5. Listen and talk to your children, boost their confidence.
6. Take action. If you let it go, it could get worse, so officially notify the school.
7. Assess the need for health care, physical or psychological, and teach your children to anticipate and act against bullying.
The first step adults should take is to listen to the child or adolescent and never minimize what is happening to them (Getty)
Finally, Zysman assured that the symptoms of bullying are clear, for which he clarified that “there are situations of loss of friendship, of difficulty integrating into groups, because the groups are marked and because they do not open the door, which do not necessarily imply bullying”. “Bullying is a form of violence that consists of deliberately humiliating a partner in a repeated and sustained manner, which has to occur in a repeated, sustained manner, where there is a great imbalance of power,” he added.
And he concluded: “The boys who are victimized no longer live it so silently, they complain that they don’t have a group to work with, that they have gatherings and are not invited, that they don’t have a good time at school. They don’t want to get up in the morning to go to school, they say they don’t want them, that it’s hard for them, and that many times what happens is that adults minimize these signs or until it explodes they don’t care about them”.
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